what is your relationship to…life?

what is your relationship to…life?

                                                                                                                     

I’m not sure there is a bigger question than this. It bears repeating:
what…is…your relationship to life?

I was in Kauai in the fall and read Elk hart Tulle’s A New Earth between beaches. And this question of his became my walking, rambling, meditation. “What is my relationship…to LIFE?!” Daunting. Spectacular. Galvanizing. Perhaps my favorite question of all time.

It opened the floodgates of inquiry for me. I spiraled it backwards to look at my relationship to my man, my child, my families of blood and soul … my portals of connectivity and on good days, communion. What was the majority experience of me showing up in the world? How is it that I am vulnerable? What feels pure and steadfast within my cells?

One question led to another. What do I bring forth from the well of my essential self, and what do I keep in reserve, locked, frightened, greedy, proud, and practical? When I engage with people what is my motive? How do I greet strangers and friends with whom I have history?

        RELATIONSHIP LIFE

What is my most regular waking thought?

What is my favorite feeling? Who am I trying to impress? How do I stand in crisis? Where does my generosity stop? What gets to the core of my core?

I actually didn’t need to delve into the deep recesses of my psyche. It turned out to be a remarkably basic exercise – one that I bet you could find your own answer to by the end of today. It all got down to this simple sub-plot question:

How am I with people?

I saw the pattern of truth emerge, a through-line to ALL of my interactions with people … with everyone, every one. Whether it is my lover-companion of ten years with whom I can be amazing or pathetic, or it’s the dude sliding my tea across the counter, there is a consistent energy and attitude that I bring to them. I can see the rhythm of it in my mind. It goes like this: I give off a honey-golden love warmth, an “I love you, we’re in this together” declaration. It’s pure and it’s innocent and is graciously global.

Then out comes this acuity, a kind of “I get you, I see you, and I’m very serious about it.” I’m not sure if it’s a natural intensity or if it’s a protective reaction that roots in fear, but often, my next level of vibe is either something along the subtle lines of “don’t fuck with me,” or “you do your thing, I’ll do mine, and all is well.”

When I looked at my relationship to the humans (and my dog counts as a human,) that I relate to, it became clear that I am a planet of love with a hair-trigger drawbridge that closes without much warning. I am, and this was somewhat heartbreaking for me to realize…I am somewhat reserved with my

Definition of Relationship

1. Relationship is not about debauchery, treachery, trickery, forgery, ignominy, infamy and obloquy; there is friendship in relationship which is perfected in companionship.

2. Relationship is not about changing your partner but loving your helpmate; it is all about understanding how different your spouse is from you and accepting him or her that way. It is in flower of the flock of every woman’s welfare to know that men are fearfully and mysteriously fantastic; it is in cock of the walk of every man’s interest to see through that women are as strange as they come. Wisdom in marriage is your ability to know that men and women are totally different from each other, that is why they attracts themselves.

3. Relationship is not about abusing the divinity that is at work in humanity, dishonesty and disloyalty. It is not about exhibiting effrontery or having unforgiving mindset. It is not about having supercilious and treacherous mission, being someone who brings disgrace on somebody’s reputation or being someone grouchy and contrary who spoils the fun of others. It is not about betrayals and trials or ravishment and abortion. It is not about intense dislike or the state of being hateful, being abrupt in manner and frustrated in ambitions. It is not about having spots before one’s eyes, being in the rough or in the ball park, putting on airs or swearing at one another, playing ducks and drakes of resources, having a squabble over state of affairs, tongue wagging or making one bleed white. It is not about a threatening stereotypical masculinity, drab monotony of habit towards filling the bill of austere and intolerant attempt for superiority, parting of ways and contravention of right-mindedness. It is not an act of damaging feeling of friendship and fellowship with GOD ALMIGHTY but a lifestyle that can go to any length, reach the deepest depths or highest heights, and cover the wildest expanse. You have ability to relate with everyone; let everyone who come in contact with you experience spiritual and emotional close friendship.

4. Emotional close friendship should be all about nurturing marital love in view of the fact that marriage is an institution which you do not get into by making tracks, moving like lightening or stepping on the gas. The decision that is made when taken a spouse does not just have effect on the spouses but effective consequences on unborn generations of the union. Taking a beautiful decision on or before uniting in marriage is a powerful determination that get you characterized by perfect happiness.